Friday, November 6, 2009

Blog Stalking - Creepy or Complimentary?


I am certifiably addicted to blogs. I've been a blogger on and off for seven years. As of today, I have 357 different subscriptions in my Google Reader, plus about 15 private blogs I follow (yeah, I know I'm crazy). I don't read EVERYTHING in detail, and I usually only comment if there's something particularly noteworthy. I'd do nothing but read blogs if I commented on every post (which I used to do). Some blogs I've been following as far back as 2002, and I stick in a few new subscriptions a month.

When I find a blog that strikes my interest, I usually read it all the way back to the beginning. That way I have reference to different family member names, significant events, etc. I spent the better part of my free time reading all of the archives on Dooce this summer. I've met approximately 20 of my blogger friends in the last two years in real life. After reading their stories, I rarely have any awkwardness meeting IRL. I call this "reading all the way back to the beginning of the blog" phenomenon blog stalking. When I tell a fellow blogger that I've stalked them, I mean it as a great compliment.

A few months ago I stumbled upon a blog of a girl from my ward. She had an interesting story and wonderful humor, and I read all of her archives. She was an acquaintence, we had common friends, and I requested her as a friend on Facebook. She immediately accepted, and we chatted well into the evening about various topics. We had kids in the same primary class, went to the same college, and I was looking forward to getting to know her better. The next time I saw her at church, I told her I'd stalked her blog back to the beginning. After church I went to look at her FB page, and she had disappeared. Not only off my friends' list, but she wasn't even found in the search feature. This means she had unfriended AND blocked me. Then I went to her blog...it was changed from public to private. Every subsequent time I tried to talk to her, she acted nervous and began avoiding me. I don't remember saying anything offensive to her....my only guess is that she was creeped out by the term "blog stalking."

Another blogging acquaintence friended me on FB this week, and we also had a good instant message conversation. I joked that I enjoyed stalking her blog, and she replied that she liked stalking mine. Yesterday I decided to contact her on FB to ask her out to lunch....and it was like deja vu - off my friends list, all previous wall posts disappeared, and not found in search. I know that being "friends" online isn't the most important thing...but I've been feeling sad about it.

So opinion time...do you think the term "blog stalking" is creepy or complimentary?

11 comments:

Jules AF said...

you're obviously joking about saying stalking! I say it all the time. How weird of them.

Lia said...

I just assumed that everyone used the term blogstalking when they'd read and not comment. Hmmm? Sounds a little extreme to react the way they did.

Kim said...

As an occasional stalker of your blog... I find that to be slightly neurotic (on their part). It is a compliment, in fact, I think the reason most people write blogs is because they want someone to care enough about them to read.

I could understand if you were an ex-boyfriend or something (that happened to a friend of mine and she privatized her blog), but this is overreaction at it's finest.

;) So stalk me if you want. I see it as a compliment and a way of finding kindred spirits out there in the interwebs.

Sidenote on an already long-winded comment: this inspired me to want to start another blog just telling a few funny/interesting stories from my life. Hmm...

WayneAndTeresa said...

I've never heard the term "blog stalker" before this. I think it's funny! Unless you really are stalking someone. Anyway, isn't it more weird to have "real life" friends who NEVER read your blog?

S. Best said...

knowing that you are stalking me...creepy...yep...creepy ;) On that note, I have to add your other blogs to my reader so that I can stalk you there, too.

Deb said...

I use the term frequently, and have gone back and read archived posts before too, although never all of them - don't have the time. I don't think it's creepy. If you weren't ok with people doing this, your blog should be private - long before someone confessed to "stalking" the blog.

Allyson & Jere said...

I VERY randomly clicked on a link on someones blog that led to a list of blogs on mormonmomswhoblog. i clicked on yours because I was intrigued by your topic. I think blog stalking is the GREATEST! And I LOVE it when people tell me, and I mean some RANDOM people have told me, that they love my blog, or have read my blog. I would NEVER have guessed that. I think it's a total compliment and not creepy at all. As you said, or someone said, don't we blog because we want people to read? Those women that blocked you are just, well, for lack of a better term...dumb, or perhaps too immature to handle the "cool" of the blog world. haha

Someday said...

Really, if they put it out there to read, why are they weirded out when someone reads it?

I blogs talk too.

Silvie - SE Impressions said...

I think the word 'stalking' is a bit too much, but it is nice to have fans! As long as it stays within boundaries. I mean, as long as it is not harassing...

Lori said...

Blog stalking sounds weird, but obviously I know you mean it in a nice way, at first I was sad 'cause nobody was commenting, then I put a beautiful picture of a flowering crab tree on and I got a lot of comments from people I didn't know, and then I got a little scared, but I'm pretty much over it now.

Jillybean said...

I just found your blog, and have read from your most recent post to this one, so I guess I've been stalking your blog.
I take it as a compliment when I see that someone has read my blog back to the beginning, or even a few months. In fact, it makes me a bit giddy ;0)
I actively stalk several people that I know IRL. I don't comment on these or let them know that I'm reading because I don't particularly want some of them to know that I have a blog. (This type of blog stalking is probably more creepy than complimentary) (but seriously, what if I wanted to write about THEM?")
I will be back.

Related Posts with Thumbnails